Look at me! I'm a winner!

Alright, if I get one more email from somebody inviting me to join MySpace, I'm probably going to shoot somebody. It's not going to happen. Why exactly do I hate MySpace? Many reasons. First off, every single page makes my brain want to bleed. This occurs due to the unholy combination of terrible design (every MySpace page looks like it was designed as part of an 8th grade computer class...back in 1994. Seriously. Though my 8th grade webpage looked better than that shit.) coupled with a terrible void of intellect in the majority of the writing. Some of the stuff that people write actually terrifies me - these morons are someday going to be decision-makers in our society. For the most part, all these MySpace pages are exactly the same. Some kitchy photo, a brief list of their favorite bands, movies, and books (ha! as if people read now days) and all this is usually followed up with some mindless drivel that I have to strain my brain to comprehend. That, mixed with an amusing attempt to get people to love them by writing a description that portrays themselves as cool as humanly possible (in terribly broken English, mind you.)

I really don't get the "networking" aspect of it either. Apparently there are people out there who try to have as many "friends" as possible - like it's some kind of contest. To be fair, Facebook has this same problem. Every once in a while somebody I don't remotely know wants me to be their friend - and I'll just ignore them. I don't get the "Pokemon" mentality of some Facebook and MySpace users, the desire to "catch 'em all" and have seemingly 400+ friends. Nobody in the world has 400+ friends. You might have 400+ acquaintences, but you sure don't have 400+ friends. I know I sure as hell don't. I suppose those people are just crying out for attention. I think there's a term for that now: "MySpace Whore". Big Daddy's in Tallahassee even sells T-Shirts with that slogan. Fitting.



As somebody said on Fark.com, "Nothing quite reverses the feminism movement than giving young females the ability to talk and post pictures." Seriously. Now I'm not being sexist - young males probably shouldn't have that right either. I look back at some of the things that I said (in yearbooks, chats, etc) and drew back in my younger years, and now a decade later I sure as hell wouldn't want that out on the web for the rest of the world to see. When you're young, you're stupid(er), and nobody needs to hear your stupid thoughts. We know you're chock full-o-angst and that your parents just don't get you. Oh and school sucks too. And that boy in 3rd period Spanish is hot. We really don't care. Granted MySpace hasn't become the whine-fest that LiveJournal is, it's still bad enough for this guy to stay the hell away.

Some have tried to tell me the merits of MySpace. It helps you network. It helps you meet new people. It helps you get laid. Good for you then. I'll still stay the hell away. I have no problem with MySpace existing because let's face it, I'd rather have all the idiots grouped together neatly in one place - that way the ease of avoiding said idiotia is simple, just stay away from that one place. Just don't keep inviting me to join, or asking me to look over your profile.

Oh, and I found this an amusing read: The Truth about MySpace

[Side note: due to some creative efforts on my part, I'm now the owner of a 2gb black iPod Nano. Net cost to me: $7. Details to come.]